Mother-Daughter Bonding

My daughter and I spent the weekend at the 32nd Annual Jackson 100 (Brownstown Speedway, Brownstown IN).  Daughter is addicted to dirt track racing.  Hubby and I have to take the blame (or the credit) for that - she's been going to the races with us since before she was born. Experts say children gravitate to sounds they heard from the womb.  She gravitates to the roar of stock car engines running wide open on dirt car tracks.

4 wide pre-race lap at Jackson 100

Daughter had been planning for this race since March, but at the last minute, the friend who was supposed to go with her backed out for reasons that seemed like excuses to us.  I encouraged daughter to let it go - not everybody has the same priorities.  But she was extremely upset and felt betrayed by her friend. I offered to go with her so she had someone to hang out with, and when she accepted, I anticipated a weekend of mother-daughter bonding.

It didn't exactly work the way I had hoped.  By the time Friday night racing was over, I was almost in tears. Instead of doing things together, Daughter wanted to control everything.  She didn't like the way I set up the tent.  She didn't like where I put the cooler.  She didn't want me getting in and out of her truck to get stuff.  Up at the track, it was my fault her camera apparently doesn't take good pictures at night - I gave it to her for Christmas.  We thought we were going to freeze sleeping in our tent, and it drizzled all night long. 

Saturday dawned wet and cool, but was an improvement over Friday.  It rained off and on all day, and we worried the race might get rained out.  We visited the pits to pass the time.  Neighboring male race fans serenaded us when we walked by in our rain boots.  "These boots are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do. One of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you."  We laughed so hard we thought we'd cry.  They broke out singing very time we walked by them for the rest of the day.  During the race, they were seated a few rows below us in the stands and they were entertaining, to say the least!  We follow a bunch of the drivers, so it was exciting to watch them battle for the lead.  Unfortunately, we were very disappointed when the only driver we didn't like won the race.   

It drizzled all night again and we woke early Sunday to pack and head for home.  Daughter was back in control mode, telling me what to do.  I wasn't allowed to put anything in the truck - it was her truck and she wanted to pack it.  She didn't like the way I folded blankets.  I didn't take the stuff out of the tent in the order she wanted to pack it.  She argued about how to fold up the tent.  She ordered me to get what I wanted out of the cooler before she closed the tailgate. Finally, we were on the road home.  

Along the way, I thought about the weekend. No, it wasn't necessarily what I had hoped it would be.  But then I remembered what she posted on Facebook when I offered to go with her, and I realized I had been thinking about things that aren't really important.  What's important is what was in her heart:  Thanks for going with me this weekend... You're always there looking out for me. So thank you. Love you. 

Complaint-Free Meals

When I was growing up, mom cooked dinner and fixed our plates, and we ate what was on our plates.  Unless we could sneak it to the dog and not get caught.  Too bad the dog didn't like broccoli.

My husband and I agreed when we had kids that we wouldn't force them to eat things they didn't like.  Now I wonder, just how stupid were we?

We should have made the kids at least TRY more foods they claimed they didn't like.  But we were young, and we thought we knew better than our parents.  We didn't force them to try things.  As they got older, we offered them choices.  This practice became more ingrained as the kids became involved in sports.  We either ate fast food on the way home from games, or we ate whatever we could find when we got home.  Sometimes we had breakfast for dinner.

Now I realize we have created monsters.  Son and daughter, for the most part, don't like the same foods.  If we fix something one likes, the other one is mad.  We try to alternate, but it's not always easy to do. And that means we are fixing two meals on nights everyone is home -- something we swore we would never do.

Not that I'm anxious for my kids to grow up and move out -- well, sometimes I am -- but Hubby and I are looking forward to the day we can cook food we like and enjoy complaint-free meals!

God Bless the USA

There are not enough words to express all the emotions swirling on this, the 10^th Anniversary of 9/11.

I had dropped my kids off at school and was on my way to work when I heard that a plane had hit the World Trade Center.  I turned the radio up and listened with disbelief as more information became available.  I don’t think I accomplished anything at work that day – I know I spent most of that day, and the days that followed, glued to the internet for whatever information I could find. 

My heart goes out to all of those who were personally touched by this tragedy.  Songs like Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning (Alan Jackson), American Soldier and Angry American (Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue) (Toby Keith) say what so many of us struggle to put into words. 

But Lee Greenwood says it best in his song God Bless the USA:

And I'm proud to be an American

where at least I know I'm free,

And I won't forget the men who died

who gave that right to me,

And I gladly stand up next to you

and defend her still today,

'Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land

God Bless the U.S.A.

Amen.

Senior Citizen Parents Take Road Trip

"We're going home."

Words that strike fear in the heart of this daughter.  "Home" is a 6-7 hour drive away from where we currently live.  It's not the thought of "home" that worries me.  It's the thought of mom and dad DRIVING there!  On a busy holiday weekend, no less!

Mom is 71, and she's been the primary driver for years.  I rarely ride with her, but when I do, I never see her move her head in any direction!  I swear she has tunnel vision and only sees what is directly in front of her.  The last time I rode with her, I asked if she ever checked her mirrors.  No brownie points for me.

Dad is three years younger, and he is a front-passenger-seat driver.  He could be a backseat driver but he never rides in the back.  He doesn't have a license, and for a very good reason: he hates driving.  When he did have a license, he scared us all to death.  He spent more time looking at the scenery than he did the road!

The trip home averages 6-7 hours and entails traversing three states.  Mom and dad plan to make the trip over two days.  I'm glad they will take their time, stopping numerous times along the way to get out and stretch.  I think they also plan to take two-lane roads rather than the interstate.  I'm hoping the holiday traffic will be less intense on the two-lane roads.

I wish cars were made better to protect drivers who aren't as quick with their reactions as they used to be.  Maybe someone should design and market special cars for senior citizens.  Cars with big front ends, and rubber bumpers all the way around would be good.  Cars with sensors everywhere so anytime the drivers get too close -- to anything! -- beepers go off, warning them to pay attention.  If my parents were driving such a car, I might feel a little better about them taking a road trip.

Don't get me wrong, I love my parents.  I hope they have a good trip.  But I will be praying for their safety.  And I will be glad when they return and stay closer to their current home!